As if we don’t already have enough laws on our books, Oklahoma legislators have decided we need at least 3,100 more.
Yes, our state representatives filed about 1,960 proposed laws and resolutions, while our state senators filed about 1,140 of them.
But have no fear, only a fraction of these bills will likely become law because December and January of each year is the legislative period that I unaffectionately call “political silly season.”
Political silly season, mercifully, is a short but brutal period when legislators unveil all sorts of cockamamie ideas aimed at further stripping Oklahomans of their freedoms or attempting to insert governmental “assistance” in areas that we’re doing perfectly well without it.
Each year, without fail, Oklahomans are unlucky enough to bear witness to a parade of bills that would be hilariously funny if it were April Fools Day. Sadly, it’s not a joke when state lawmakers are wasting taxpayer resources filing ludicrous proposals they actually believe in or – more likely – hope will score them cheap political points.
For instance, please raise your hand if you’re participating in robotic cockfighting.
Anyone? House Bill 1326, filed by a Republican, seeks to legalize fighting real roosters against robotic ones as long as the live cock doesn’t get hurt.
Uhm. I’ve never been to a cockfight, but isn’t incapacitating a rival rooster the whole point? Isn’t that why the sport is viewed as so barbaric it’s classified as a felony in our state? I guess I know which bird my money will always be on.
Then there’s a Republican measure proposing that we rename the Department of Corrections the Department of Corruption.
I could see changing the name to the Department of Punishment because traditionally legislators have favored policies that lock people up for inordinate amounts of time with little interest in rehabilitating them, leading to some of the highest incarceration rates in the nation.
But if the Department of Corruption gains traction, I can only imagine how conversations would go behind the walls of our prisons.
“I’m with the Department of Corruption, and I’m here to shake you down, twerp. Hand me all your commissary funds.”
Speaking of convicted felons, we have another Republican lawmaker who has filed legislation seeking to protect President Donald Trump’s so-called “constitutional right” to vote in Oklahoma. According to a press release from the legislator, the point of the bill is to “send a clear message that every American, and especially the president of the United States, is afforded their full rights and protections in Oklahoma, regardless of political attacks elsewhere.”
For starters, Trump doesn’t have a “constitutional right” to vote in Oklahoma because he doesn’t live here. Like everywhere else in this country, we only allow residents to vote in our elections.
When Trump’s latest stint in the White House is up in four years, I don’t see him suddenly trading his cushy, oceanfront digs in Florida and moving himself and Melania to landlocked Oklahoma.
Then there are the two useless Republican bills that seem aimed at harming the homeless.
The first makes it a misdemeanor crime, punishable by up to a year in jail, to remove a shopping cart from a retail store. It’s already a crime to steal any item from businesses, so why do we need to carve out shopping carts?
A second bill allows municipalities to expend funds on one-way bus tickets to destinations out of state for their homeless. The bill does not require unhoused residents to agree to the removal, which raises some serious constitutional questions.
If that becomes law, I’m certain our neighboring states will adopt similar legislation that allows them to send their homeless to Oklahoma.
And don’t get me started on the proposed “Covenant Marriage Act.” It proposes offering couples a $2,500 tax credit if they agree to be married forever. The only way to escape that would be if your spouse commits one of the terrible three “As” — abuse, adultery or abandonment.
And while we’re on the topic of trapping people in loveless marriages, that same Republican lawmaker wants to ban no-fault divorce. That means “incompatibility” would no longer be grounds to end a marriage. Legitimate grounds for divorce would include “insanity for a period of five years” that requires being institutionalized and a “poor prognosis for recovery.” It also would remove incarceration as grounds for divorce.
Political silly season should drive Oklahomans insane. Can we get a bill that grants Oklahomans a divorce from dumb legislative ideas?
The good news is ridiculous legislation typically meets an early demise each year during the annual legislative session.
But bills like these are bad for a state that’s trying to convince people and businesses that we live in the 21st century, and that we have state leaders that share that mindset.
So here’s hoping that next year a miracle occurs and that every piece is focused on raising our lagging outcomes.
But I’m not holding my breath.
Oklahoma Voice (oklahomavoice.com) is an affiliate of States Newsroom, the nation’s largest state-focused nonprofit news organization, supported by grants and donations. Oklahoma Voice provides nonpartisan reporting, and retains full editorial independence.